


Of Strip Poker and Alien Junk

by gringle



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alien Cultural Differences, Altean Keith (Voltron), Drabble, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Humor, Pre-Slash, Prince Keith (Voltron), Sleepovers, Sleepy Cuddles, Team Bonding, a surprising lack of actual strip poker despite the title, discussions of alien junk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 06:56:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18493726
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gringle/pseuds/gringle
Summary: Short Drabble I did revolving around Altean Prince Keith and his new Human friends that keep stealing his big bed for their evening tomfoolery





	Of Strip Poker and Alien Junk

**Author's Note:**

  * For [jaythefae](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jaythefae/gifts).



> SOMEONE'S in a "fuck it, post everything you have" mood rn
> 
> literally this has been in my wips for a year. A YEAR. I want to just share my love for Altean Prince Keith, so here's a little dollop of him! I have more thoughts on this boy.

Prince Keith wasn’t quite sure when his bedroom became fair use for the other paladins to barge in and gather there, but he supposed it was because his bed was large enough for eight grown men to sleep comfortably. If the five of them wanted some quality bonding time in the late evenings, after Allura and Coran have retired for the evening, they would all take up spots on his bed and relax. 

At first, Shiro was extremely apologetic when Lance ushered them all in and made them play games with a deck of cards, which he fashioned out of some sort of flexible plastic he must have found. Hunk insisted they paint designs on them sometime in the future, as soon as they find the right colors that will adhere to the cards correctly. They played some Earth card game, “Canasta” they called it, until they started nodding off in his bed. Instead of kicking them out, Keith decided that it wasn’t worth the trouble, and he tucked himself in for the night, letting the other four fend for themselves in terms of blankets and pillows. After a few incidents of this, the prince gathered up extra bedding from the storage area, cleaned the aged smell out of them, and stowed them away in a compartment of his room. 

Once he started bringing out the blankets for them, they didn’t bother asking if they were welcome. Shiro once pulled him aside and asked him if he was uncomfortable, but Keith simply touched his shoulder and explained that “they would know when they weren’t welcome”.

The prince didn’t mind the activity: he slept well either way. It secretly warmed his heart and made him feel included, as they spent hours talking about Earth things. He learned a lot about their cultures, like how each of them had a vastly different upbringing despite living on the same planet. 

“We’re not playing strip poker,” Hunk declared one night. “I don’t care what I said when I was drunk.”

“What’s strip poker?” Keith asked, crawling up into bed and sprawling against his personal pile of pillows.

Lance smirked in such a way that foretold mischief. “It’s a game where if you lose, you keep taking off clothes until someone is naked.”

Keith’s face pinched in confusion, while Shiro silently scowled at Lance, ready to reprimand. “Why would you play that? Seems pointless.” Keith said.

“Because it is pointless,” Pidge declared, rolling her eyes. “And I’m definitely not playing.”

“I wouldn’t expect you to, Pidgey,” Lance reassured. “We could just tally up your losses with a datapad.” 

“But instead you tally up losses based on the clothing you take off?” Keith asked. “Wouldn’t it be better if everyone just tallied their losses by writing them down?” 

He couldn’t figure out the reason for this strange Earth game, and it didn’t seem like anyone else was willing to share. Hunk’s face was turning a bright red, which meant he probably wouldn’t contribute for a few moments. Shiro looked ready to change the subject entirely, if not for Pidge silently putting her hand on his arm to hold him back. From the looks of it, it seemed like Keith was about to learn one of Earth’s ‘Embarrassing Customs’.

“Then you lose the point of the game!” Lance exclaimed, waving his hands in the air with indignance. 

“And the point is?” Keith asked, eyebrow raised. 

“To humiliate other people in their nakedness,” Lance said, punctuating it with a nod of finality.

“Lance,” Keith said, leaning forward from his pillowed throne to grasp Lance’s hand gingerly. Keith finally understood the game, and why no one else was in favor of it aside from Lance. “Are you embarrassed about your physique?”

The shock crossing Lance’s face only emboldened Keith’s efforts. “Lance, your body is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s quite dashing, really.” Keith complemented, patting the top of Lance’s hand like his sister did to him when he was nervous. 

“Oh my God,” Pidge whispered, sounding giddy. Keith ignored her.

“No, wait-” Lance started to say, but Keith talked over him.

“You have well-filled shoulders, and you have a complimenting torso and hip ratio. You have no need to feel ashamed for your body. I personally find it quite nice.”

Keith heard a strangled noise that came from Hunk’s mouth, but Keith didn’t look at him, firmly staring into Lance’s eyes. 

“Ultimately, though, you are healthy, and that’s the most important part. Let no one else’s standards define your self-confidence.”

“Oh, my God. Keith, STOP!” Lance screeched, his face going red as the other three humans laughed at his expense. 

Keith watched them laugh, but he had a feeling that they weren’t laughing at him specifically, so he let go of Lance’s hand with a final squeeze before scooting back and lounging against his headboard. He fought to hide the smirk creeping up his face, watching Lance flounder from actual compliments. For a flirt, he can hardly receive what he so unabashedly gave.

“Hunk! Did you pay him to say that?!” Lance cried, hiding his face in his hands.

Hunk wiped a tear from his eye, finding a moment to breathe after laughing so hard. “No, but I now I want to pay him to say stuff like that to me every day of my life.” 

“You don’t need to pay me to tell the truth, Hunk,” Keith said earnestly. “You exude charm, and your appearance displays strength and health. There’s no need to concern yourself with your image. It’s already impeccable.”

Hunk cooed at him. “Aww, thanks buddy!” He leaned over, shoving Lance in the process, to give Keith a big hug.

Keith grinned, wrapping his arms around Hunk’s torso and leaning his head against Hunk’s shoulder. For some reason, Keith stopped shying away from physical contact ever since he woke up from cryosleep. He assumed Hunk had a direct correlation to it, considering his personal adoration for Hunk’s hugs.

When they let go, Keith already started making room for Hunk to sit next to him, with Lance to Hunk’s left. Shiro was already laying down, positioning his body between the door and the rest of them, most likely planning on watching the door through most of the night. For the moment, though, he was facing the rest of them to join in the conversation. Pidge, to Keith’s right, had a stack of pillows piled in her lap, letting her head rest on them with little effort as she curled her arms and legs around it.

“All embarrassing Lance-stupidity aside, he wanted to play strip poker so he could see your alien junk,” Pidge said, finally getting to the center of the issue.

Lance sputtered, trying to come up with excuses, but Keith wasn’t going to pay attention to them. “That wouldn’t have worked anyway,” Keith said. “You have to ask permission to see anyone’s genitals.” 

“Is there some sort of cultural rule?” Shiro asked politely, head tilted in curiosity.

“For Lance and Hunk to know for future reference,” Pidge muttered, earning a glare from the two boys, their cheeks red. Keith ignored the comment. 

The prince shook his head. “No, I mean that there is no way to accidentally see it. I have to choose to make them available. The game would have been pointless.”

“You mean like… your junk is tucked away? Like a dolphin’s?”

“I’m not sure what you mean by ‘dolphin’, but possibly,” Keith replied.

"That's so weird!" Lance said. 

"It would be weirder if 'my junk' just hung about uselessly during my day-to-day life," Keith replied rolling his eyes at the absurdity. "At least it's safely out of the way."

Shiro looked away, as though guilty or bashful. Hunk started whistling a tune Keith didn't recognize. It took a moment for Keith to fully process what was being implied.

"No," he whispered, horror dawning on his face as it sank in. "You don't mean-" 

"Yup," Pidge declared.

"That's disgusting!" Keith said, his face pinching up, and Pidge cackled at the reaction.

"It's not like our species are shape-shifters like yours," Hunk defended with a blush, though a bit halfheartedly. He was smiling, watching everything lazily as he settled in for the night, his eyes lowered in drowsiness.

“We don't shape-shift for such a thing. It simply is,” Keith defended.

“Like a dolphin,” Lance said, flopping down so his head landed on a fluffy pillow by Shiro's head. 

“Sure, I guess.”

Pidge yawned, and Shiro called it for the night, voice commanding the lights to turn down low to make the room more accommodating for everyone headed to bed.

"I'm still disappointed in you all. I was going to cheat Keith until he was nude like the day he was born," Lance mumbled, and Keith could hear the rustle of some fabrics as he tucked himself in for the night.

"Regular poker requires that you lie," Keith mumbled. "You can't lie during that game whatsoever, so I doubt you could have accomplished your goal in the strip version of it, anyway."

He heard Lance huff, but no quip came out. Lance must be tired if he couldn't create a decent comeback to Keith's soft jibe. He heard a couple of breathy chuckles from Pidge and Hunk, agreeing with him.

Prince Keith fell asleep to the soft sounds of four humans' even breathing.


End file.
